No More Doors: The Proceeding Journal Entry

6-24-08 – After 6:00 PM – Sweet Jesus. I wanted to go further with that recording from today, but Russell walked in the door and I had to pull it together. Now he's fiddling with the antenna. Bursts of energy are still continuing if I don't block them or if I release my mind to them. The real blasts came after I cleansed the ___ and went to the kitchen because I still had images of women in my mind telling me what to do and that I needed milk as soon as I thought milk might calm my stomach. So I got a glass and filled it up and thought I heard one of them say, “So cleanse it already,” or something like that, but it may have been my egoic mind interfering with the thought of being followed by a group of completely open and powerful spirit women or shamanesses all clad in simple brownish robes.

    So I did cleanse it and thought specifically about the way women would heal and use this yin Kunlun energy to cleanse something. It wouldn't be by forcing it or even directing it with the will in any way other than forming the simple and specific intent to cleanse the milk, attach your attention to that cool flow of yin energy pouring into you, letting it splash back up and raise your left hand, then with no thought or concern at all letting it loop down and wash away any impurities in the milk. No attachment to the intent after it is created. It is done.

    Then I thought of those powerful shining balls of white light on the woman's fingertips and thought, What two fingertips does she have these balls of light on? The two middle fingers? It didn't feel right, so I used my intuition and let my hands dangle in the Kunlun position and thought of a ball of white light on my left middle finger and a ball of white light on the right ring finger, and then I connected them with a stream of white light.

    That's when the jolts started. The stream was so immediately intense that I started going WHOA! WHOA! every time one would zap through me. It was as if I was combining spiritual energy and physical energy in a very significant way. I walked into the living room to write down how intense it was when it kept happening. I saw nothing in my visual field, but I imagined myself seeing huge flashes of light all around me every time I felt a jolt. I kept saying WHOA! every singe time. That was all that could possibly be said. WHOA! And eventually I decided it would be impossible and take too long to write, so I turned on the recorder.